It's been a trying and tiring couple of weeks. After returning from Indiana, PA, I was extremely exhausted. My neighbors have been awesome when it comes to watching my pets while I've been out of town. I need to say that, because I don't want you to think that I blame them for what happened when I was gone. I forgot to notify them that I had moved the cat's litter box down into the basement, as well as her food. So, sometime during the weekend they closed the downstairs door, so that Honey was stuck in the top two floors. To show her displeasure, she pooped and peed on my bed. Yep, on top of my bed! At was the foot of the bed, but it was on the bed nonetheless. Judging by the size of the poop, I thought it was Fritz and I was upset. The things that  I said to that dog, the anger that  I had toward that dog were unholy. I was so tired and angry about the whole thing. It turned out that he wasn't any angel either, as I discovered several wet spots around the house, in areas that the cat couldn't get to, and didn't smell like cat. So, for two days, I was extremely upset with him. I'd get upset with her, but what good would it do? She definitely wouldn't understand. I'm watching my house get destroyed piece by piece and I was completely dejected by it all. On the one hand, I was upset about the state of the house, on the other, I was ashamed of my reaction to Fritz. Now, I'm taking Fritz out 3 times a day, instead of once and the obligatory backyard jaunt. At least when I take him out, I can guarantee that he goes potty. One week, no accidents in the house. I'm delighted.

    The exhaustion stems from the usual lack of judgment when it comes to bedtime and from the fact that until last night, I was sleeping in the Papa San chair. I bought Febreze for the bed, but I'm afraid that there is a still an odor when you get up close to it. Fortunately, it doesn't permeate the room (to my knowledge). I'll replace the mattress sometime, perhaps when I have to share it with someone. That could be some time. No prospects for me, and for the first time in a while, I'm not pining over anyone in particular. Sure, I like attention, and so I'll flirt, but I'm not putting anyone into my domestic fantasies. For today, it suits me fine.

    I'm trying to adjust my schedule down. I'm attempting to wake up at 5:00 AM, so that I can get home earlier etc. I wasn't successful this morning, but I did get in 45 minutes earlier than usual. Tonight, it's an early bed time, heck, it's only 7 and I'm already yawning.

    On Friday, I received a call from my brother, asking me if I was planning on driving down to Fredricksburg on Saturday. I asked him "Why?" He informed me that it was my nephew Timothy's birthday. He was named for me, isn't that cool! He's a charmer, that's for sure, but I'm digressing. Some uncle I am, I forgot all about his birthday. Fortunately, my sister talks to my sister-in-law and then I get the information I need. I didn't even realize they were having a party for him. So we headed down on Saturday. On Sunday, I spent some time at my brother's house, before making plans to see Star Wars again. This time though, we went to the Digital Screening of Star Wars. There are about 50 Digital Projectors in the United States today, and one of them is next door to where I work, so we gathered some buddies together and went to see it. It still has it's problems, but I did enjoy some parts quite a bit. I think my favorite scene is one where Obi Wan Kenobi, finishes off one of the creatures in the Arena Battle. His hair was spilling over his face, and he had this look as he twisted the lightsaber. It was perhaps the realest portion of the movie, and one in which you could (as a guy) nod your head in assent, and say Yeah! I think I figured out the fundamental problem with Star Wars today. Sure, you can knit pick over this and that and I would agree, but I think the primary problem is that there is no one to root for. You can root for Yoda and Obi Wan Kenobi, but you know they survive, so there's really no suspense there. R2-D2 and C-3P0 are just droids. Padme and Annakin? Nope, Padme has fallen in love with a confessed murderer and Annakin is turning bad, hardly a hero to you and me. So, you watch this car accident because you're curious, but how in the world can you go home satisfied? Did it have to be this way? I'm not sure it had to be, but it is what is, and the third film will undoubtedly be a disappointment for those of us who fell in love with Star Wars because it was a classic battle between good and evil, and the good guys win. This movie also left us with a handful of questions to be answered. So, I'll be there for Episode III. If you think about it, despite all the complaints we have with the series, we still have a chance to revisit a world that enchanted us for so long, and that's more than any sci-fi, or science fantasy fan could ask for. J.R.R. Tolkien is gone and with it Middle Earth. Once the Lord of the Rings is told, it's over. Same with C.S. Lewis and the wonderful world of Narnia. It will probably be some time before someone captivates our imagination on such a grand scale again. The Matrix trilogy looks quite appealing, but I doubt that we'll be pining over it in 10 - 20 years in quite the same way.

    Softball started with a whimper this year. We've had many rainouts and I had some bad games early on. So much so, I thought I would be relegated to the bench for the rest of the year. Fortunately, they had me bat in the lead off spot during our second game on Monday night. I think that I scored every time I got to the plate. Hopefully, they'll keep me there. I don't have a lot of power, but I do have a lot of speed, so it makes sense for me to be there. The good thing about having doubleheaders each time we play is that I don't mind sitting for a game, I can still keep score or be a base coach. Not everyone has that feeling just yet. Some people take it personally when they aren't elevated, or if they think they have been demoted. The team is beginning to play better, although there is some bickering going on. We're now 4 - 6. The top two teams in each division advance onto the playoffs. We're currently in 5th out of 6 teams. Nothing will compare with the 2 seasons I played in Albany, but this one's not too bad.

    Speaking of Albany, I'm planning to be there around the July 4 weekend, so watch your e-mail's. I hope that a number of us can get together.

    Work is OK. We have a new employee. He's a senior software developer, and he's already making me feel foolish. Just Kidding, I'm learning some valuable information from him, even as I feel ignorant about some fairly basic issues at times. I've been looking for a professional mentor at this job. I know what I know and I learn as I go, but sometimes, it's hard to get a definitive answer about things from a book. Experience can be a good teacher, and he seems to be generous in offering suggestions, in a totally non-offensive way. He alluded to the possibility that we might both be heading to California in July. I already turned down one trip to California recently, because it would have been this week, and I missed being a homebody.

    Well that's all the info that you've been clamoring for, I think. Talk to you all soon.

    The internet is in the process of reinventing itself. What was once "free" has now turned into pay sites. A few sites have stuck their necks out, but I think the pain will only be temporary. You can teach people to do almost anything, whether it benefits them or not. When your trade is information, as many of these sites are, then you withhold any information that a user may want. My first example is Gamespot.com. They do a good job of getting a lot of the latest computer game news. About a month ago, they started a pay service. I actually don't blame them, if you're doing this stuff full time, advertising and direct sales of other vendor's products just aren't going to cut it. That doesn't mean I'm going to pay for those extras though. Just don't be surprised when the sites that you most frequent start to do this as well. My second example is Hotmail.com. A couple of months ago they put a cap on the amount of disk space you could have, and then "allowed" you to buy more, for the low price of $20 a year. That first step was no big deal for me, but recently they notified me that as of July 16th, you will no longer be able to download your Pop messages. Which is disappointing. I'm going to be weaning myself off of it, because I use hotmail primarily to get my messages off of faulguy. My website host has an internet portal for e-mail, so I'll just have to switch over to using that more frequently. Oh, the conveniences lost!

    In other computer news... I received an e-mail from matchmaker@someonelikesyou.com. I'm not going through this again. So if you like me, just let me know. I could use the encouragement. This is just a clever way of grabbing valid e-mail addresses for future spamming. Fortunately, I'm not desperate to know, and I'm sure that with my current social life, I wouldn't be blown away by the revelation.

    I'm trying to decide on what to do about my computer. I was reading on gamespot, (this part was free) about how to build my own computer. It's an exercise that I'd like to try and it doesn't seem too daunting. Plus I can buy the parts over a several month period. The only problem is that you really have to buy the CPU first, so once you get started, you might as well finish, as the prices will continue to descend on new chips, but not necessarily as much on other parts of the computer. The other option is selecting a Dell. It will cost me about $1200 to outfit a 2GZ Pentium 4 not including the monitor. The question is can I build it cheaper, and better, and for that matter, gain the knowledge required to do all of my own upgrades in the future? I've already upgraded just about everything I can on this computer, except memory. I'm not buying anything else for this computer.

    Meanwhile, my old free TV is starting to act up which affects my X-box gaming. Oh, what a simple life I lead. So, I have to decide when I want to plunk down a couple hundred bucks for a new one, or to see if I can find one at a garage sale. A garage sale would be preferable to me, but you can never tell if you'll find one you like. I still don't have cable, and they are in the process of raising the rates, which means I'll probably get a dish, if I get anything at all. Before, I get a dish though, I really need to get started on home decorating and repair.

    This past weekend, I went over to a fellow church member's house, and helped him paint in preparation for a home sale. He's been called to go to the Pastor's college for 10 months, so he has decided to sell instead of holding onto it and renting it out. It's a huge honor in our church to be chosen for Pastor's college. I'm sure it's a huge honor in every church, but with the emphasis on character and humility as primary qualities, it's seems all the more difficult to be chosen. In our culture, and particularly here in Northern Virginia there is a pronounced emphasis on taking care of yourself and climbing up the corporate ladder. Some of the character issues that are taught in my church are anathema to our culture. Being humble, usually means that you're prime material for being stepped on. All in all the folks I go to church with are a good bunch. So good in fact, I'm thinking of trying to get a church softball team together for the fall.

    I'm really starting to dislike my work softball team. When we are winning, everything is fine, but as soon as we start losing, a group of guys just won't let other people's mistakes go. I made a pretty bad error on a pop up, and I heard one of the guys say, "Oh my God!" or something like that. I do a pretty good job of feeling bad when I let people down, I just don't need to be hearing that. Not long after that, that same guy, walked off the field in disgust. Which is kind of funny, because I didn't enter the game until we were down by about 10 runs. They took out our starting pitcher, and I figured we're just trying to end this thing. We had won the first game by a pretty good margin, and then we just didn't hit or catch during the second game. I need more practice, but in a co-ed league, it just needs to be dialed down a notch. Take care of your game and leave the rest of the people be. The sad thing is that I kind of like that guy, but I know that I like him only when I'm playing well, because then your accepted, which is not unlike High School. I'm not in High School anymore. So, I'll continue to play, but I can't wait for the season to be over. Nothing is like it used to be in Albany.

    I'm planning on taking Fritz with me when I visit Albany in July. He's currently barking at Honey right now, because he wants to play. He's been a joy this past week or so. I hope it continues. Honey has become quite comfortable with him lately. He's part of the family now. I really need a camera for those moments when Honey is laying on his side. It's the cutest thing.

    I'm coming down with something. I just sneezed and my throat has been exceedingly dry over the last 24 hours. I hope it passes quickly. Well, I better get to bed early, I definitely need the rest. Night all.

    Today has gotten worse than planned. It's not really bad at all, but I don't like the feeling I'm having right now. Here's my predicament. Softball's not fun, so I'll be glad when the season is over. At the same time, I want to keep my commitment and show up whenever available. Tonight's game was rained out, even though, the sun has been shining for several hours. Because the fields are in decent shape they scheduled practice. I went to 2 different fields and wasted about an hour because I wasn't sure if I misread the e-mail on practice. Suffice to say, no one was at either field, so I went home. I won't find out until tomorrow if we had a practice at all or if I just went to the wrong two fields. Because of the rainout, they are going to be rescheduling the game on the 29th, and I will probably not be able to make it, as I imagine I'll be on the road to NY. Based on the makeup schedule, I'll miss 3 of our 4 doubleheaders. So, even though I don't want to play, I also don't want to look like I punked out on the team because things weren't going my way. I actually don't mind that I'm not starting every game, but I do mind, that I can't take the sum total of my game and go home happy. Because my attitude isn't in the right place, I'm not comfortable with missing so many games. If my heart were in the right place about this, I wouldn't feel like I was wimping out of an uncomfortable situation. C'est La Vie! Whattya gonna do?

    I don't have a lot to share with the gallery this week, except that I'm a wee bit disappointed in the lack of response from my friends in Albany. I sent a mass e-mail and have only received one response to it. There are several people on the list, that I've been quite close with that haven't said a word in some time. Not good. I tend to make up stories in my head when people are silent. The quiet people bug me. They make me babble even more than I do without provocation. It's like their silence is taunting me. They smile, they swivel their neck and screw up  their eyes as if they don't understand, or worse, like they are judging you. So, I tend to take that as a sign that they didn't get my point, or thought the worst of it, and so I try to insulate it with more words, usually of the politically correct variety.

    The Middle East. There's a spot that's not too politically correct right now. I'm having a hard time, understanding how some of the peaceniks are blaming Israel for what's happening in Israel. I don't understand why Suicide (Homicide) Bombers are morally superior to Israel's military in their cause. I'm also confused as to why so many people hate or dislike the Jews. I'm not even just talking about today. The Holocaust killed millions of them, and they've been batted around Europe and the Middle East for millennia. Nobody can seem to explain what it is that they hate about Jews except that they were cheap and that they owned everything. Which to me, is something to emulate not to scorn. Not the cheapness, but the success they've attained. Then again, no one can explain why Polish folks are the butt of so many jokes. Anyway, I don't know how anyone can not look at what's happening on the Arab side of the equation without some trepidation and disgust. On their televisions stations they are glorifying the Martyrs and teaching their young that the Jews are pigs. We wouldn't tolerate any of that in this country. In fact we take great pleasure in mocking the remaining members of the KKK as ignorant hillbillies and yet, in Palestine, they are noble freedom fighters. Some argue that Israel is a bully, and if all you had were stones against tanks, you would find a way to fight the against tyranny. I disagree. I disagree because we've had at least three outstanding examples of peaceful protest that lead to freedom. The first was Ghandi, who stood his ground peacefully and eventually the British withdrew and India became it's own sovereignty.  The second was Martin Luther King. I doubt that he would have gotten the American public on his side, had he punctuated his message with violence. The third was Nelson Mandela. There are still a great deal of problems in South Africa, but at least they are holding elections. America would be much more sympathetic with the Palestinians if they stopped the violence and just pointed to the injustices that the Israeli's have done to them. There would be a Palestinian state in a minute, if they just stopped bombing. The problem is that it won't stop, because even if Yasser Arafat wanted a Palestinian state, Hamas doesn't. They won't be content until Israel is removed from the region. So if Arafat doesn't control Hamas, Israel is going to do it for them. At the expense of the Arabs in the West Bank and elsewhere. This little rant is so insufficient to this topic.

    Even though today didn't end up the best, I've had a couple of positive days. I was sick on Saturday and had absolutely no drive to do anything. I was pretty bummed by that, because I had some great ideas for doing the home maintenance thing and Saturday's are quite precious. Well, on Monday I started to kick myself in the butt to take care of all the little things as I see them around the house. Meaning, no more dropping clothes on the floor at bedtime, no more leaving dishes out for tomorrow. No more stacking bills for an appointed time. Instead, I've decided that I need to do all the little things on a day to day basis, so that when I do get some inspiration, I can actually use it toward bigger projects. So, I've been walking around a bit more satisfied as my kitchen remains cleaner, my pictures are starting to get hung, even though I may paint it later. (I was procrastinating on some picture hanging because I had planned to paint)

    Gotta go walk Fritz, he's starting to bark at me. :-)

    You didn't think I'd leave town without saying goodbye did you? Well, it could have easily happened. I still haven't packed yet. I'm a procrastinated packer. Sounds perverse doesn't it? As many of you know I'll be heading to Albany tomorrow morning. Don't even think about robbing my house while I'm gone. I have 24 hour surveillance and an attack cat who is sure to be waiting at the door when you enter. If you do somehow manage to get past security, then please steal this computer. It's old, and it needs to be retired. I need to set up a computer fund so I can get it sooner than later. Little purchases pile up, and some of them are actually house related for a change. I picked up a 6 lb tub of oxiclean or is it oxyclean. I don't know, but a co-worker said it did wonders for his carpet. So I'll give it a shot. That is, when I return.

    Well, I sent a second e-mail out last week alerting my old co-workers of my arrival and on this one I finally got some response, although not from everyone. It makes me wonder. One of my best friends has been incognito for months. I know that she excels as a in town friend, perhaps she just lacks in the long distance friendship thing. It happens, but I still want an explanation if I see her while I'm up there. :-) As it turns out I'll be spending at least 50% of my time with friends which is fantastic, but my parents also want to spend time with me, so the guilt begins to set in. The thing is, I talk to my parents much more frequently than my friends, and I also have a need to connect with them, since I've been kind of peer deficient here.

    Softball is over for me. The last 2 doubleheaders will occur when I'm out of town. It's been a thoroughly disappointing season for me. I haven't played well, and even when I did, there was always the fear that if I screwed up, I'd be benched. To have played so well, just 2 years ago, and then to feel like a liability at times this season has been hard to comprehend. I know that my primary problem out there was that at night, I wasn't judging the ball very well. So, it made things difficult for me. I need new glasses, but who's to say that it would have fixed anything. It's time to put it behind me, and look toward a fresh start elsewhere, because I'm not going to play under those conditions again. Too critical for a co-ed after work league.

    Work is dandy, I'm heading to San Francisco in a couple of weeks. It will be my first trip to California. Neat huh? A part of me doesn't like the hassle of traveling, but this place is kind of neat, so I'm looking forward to it. For that trip, I'm leaving my attack dog. So, beware!

    I'm starting to become peckish, so I need to boil me up some hotdogs. Yeah, I know, dinner of champions. Someone rescue me from my cooking!!!! I am making some progress albeit slowly. The other morning, I actually made myself eggs before work, which was amazing on a number of levels. I don't typically eat before work, mostly because I wake up too late. I've been getting up at least an hour earlier than I used to, and sometimes 2 hours. Oooh, how you like that one! If I remember correctly, I rarely used my oven in Albany. I'm using it more frequently here. Although, it's usually for Stromboli.

         I'm bringing Fritz with me on this trip, he'll get to play with my parents dog Jonah. Jonah is also a beagle, but much bigger. He's actually quite rotund and he loves to lick. Now that I have a dog, I look at other people and their choices in dogs, and there is something to that old saying about how people look like their dogs. If nothing else, a dog can reflect their personality. In my case, Fritz likes to talk to other dogs. Forcefully, in fact. I'm learning a thing or two about how to jump on other people's cases to establish my dominance. When that doesn't work, I just pee in their yard. Fritz has been quite delightful ever since I returned from my last trip. I guess it's been about a month, and no accidents in the house... that I'm aware of.

    I had a chance to see Minority Report last Sunday. I rounded up a few of the childless couples and singles from my church and we went and saw a matinee. I must say that it's much better than AI. It's a very tight movie, quite exciting and also humorous in the right spots. I recommend it, you won't be disappointed. I love movies that make you think and keep you guessing. And I like Tom Cruise. I think he's a capable actor. No he's not Deniro but in most films I see him in, he keeps my attention. Edward Norton does that well too.

    Well, I'm running out of procrastination rope. I need to prepare for the trip tomorrow. It should be fun to have Fritz in the car for 8 hours or so. Hopefully he lulls himself to sleep early on. In the short trips I've had him on, he always wants to climb in my lap for comfort. I can't drive like that. Pray he doesn't jump on me at a crucial moment tomorrow. I can't keep him in a crate for the whole trip, so this is the way I'm transporting him. Take care. I'll tell you all about my trip when I get back.