Happy 29th Birthday!

October 1, 2002

    I've been positively complacent about my website as of late. I have been coveting my time in the house, because I'll be traveling a lot in October. The traveling starts tomorrow. I'll be leaving for Florida in the afternoon. On the heels of that trip, I'll be headed to St. Louis. Then later in the month, I'll be traveling to Oklahoma. So this will be a busy month. My brother has agreed to watch Fritz for me while I'm gone on this leg of the tour. Although my cat is in my lap, I still miss my dog. My brother's family took him home tonight so that I won't have to trek up to his home before my flight tomorrow. Yep, I miss him already.

    For those who don't know, today is my birthday. I'm 29 now. In many ways I feel as though I've accomplished quite a bit thus far. This year has seen a new house, a newer car, a new computer and a dog. I'm going to church for the first time in over 10 years and I'm single. Most men won't admit that approaching 30 bothers them at all. I'm a bit too nostalgic and superstitious and romantic to not try to put some poignancy into the milestone. Will this kick me in the butt to make myself a better person before it's too late? I'm not sure about that. If in fact, I do become a better person this year, it probably won't be because I'm making a concerted effort at it. Most likely it would be the result of being in a place for two years. When I was in Albany, my life didn't get good until I had been there for two years. The same could be said of when I lived in Colorado Springs. It takes me a little while to meet people and become comfortable enough with them to start living life again. In many ways, I've been in a holding pattern, just maintaining the status quo of paying the bills and working toward my free time. In recent months I've been a bit more active and have begun to hang out with people that I met in my church. There aren't a lot of singles in my church, but there are some childless couples that I hang out with from time to time. I still don't have cable so I usually try to find someone who likes watching Survivor and head to their house and on Sunday a buddy of mine has the Sunday ticket for football, so I check out the Redskins game over there.

    This past weekend, I found myself at the Orioles game. They were playing the Yankees and the crowd was mostly from NY I think. There were definitely more Jeter and Giambi shirts than Oriole shirts in the stands. The Yankees won. The Orioles sucked down the stretch. They won 4 games and lost 31 or 32 games. Still, it was fun to go to a baseball game with my brother and 2 other guys. As it turned out we were in Baltimore for a retreat and so it was just a hop, skip and a jump to the park.

    I've realized something recently. I'm tired of dating. Not because of anything recent that happened to me. I'm just not interested in any situation that won't lead me toward some permanent arrangement. I have a feeling that the next one will probably be the one. Several months back I had dispensed with the temporary placeholders that had so kept my mind and heart involved so I wouldn't be alone, and it's helped. Oh sure, I've occasionally imagined different scenarios, or what ifs, but they have been in passing and not the all consuming infatuations that I've been accustomed to.

    I do want to take back one statement I made earlier about not improving because of a concerted effort. That's not exactly true and I don't feel like back spacing over it. Instead I'll explain why I changed my mind on that statement. There are some cosmetic things that I'd like to do. In general I need to take better care of myself. I need to get some dental work done soon. It's been too long since I've gone to the confessional known as the dentist. I always feel like I'm confessing my sins of not enough brushing, not enough flossing. I also need to get new glasses and contacts. I've been wearing the same ones that my dog chewed up because I rarely care what my co-workers think and I've just been lazy about it. I'm also planning to do some clothes shopping while I'm down in Florida, because I rarely leave the house and feel like I look good. I also ran out of my favorite cologne and haven't bothered replacing it. So, in general I've let myself go a bit while I've taken care of other parts of my life, and it's time to start caring about how I look etc. I know that women do this from time to time, and that men probably don't talk about it very much. I also need a haircut, which I'll get while I'm down there as well. In my assessment I'm pretty shaggy right now, complete with the lazy man's shave, affectionately called a goatee.

    My birthday has been pretty decent. Both of my parents called me at work today, which is not something that they usually do. My brother and his family brought dinner over and baked me a cake. I made my wish and blew out the candles. The kids made me cards, which were humorous and heart warming. Shortly after dinner I received a surprise phone call from a friend whom I didn't expect to hear from. If she's reading this, it was a pleasant surprise and thanks for thinking of me on my birthday. I hope to talk to you before your birthday later this year.

    I also received some other birthday wishes along the way, including a friend that I will see while I'm down in Florida. She's going to be my fashion consultant as I begin to transform the exterior of my life. The trip should be pretty low key and I haven't really made any other plans other than shopping. It's kind of hard for me to go out by myself and go to an amusement park. Although, I might do it for the heck of it. We'll see. Disney World has a lot to see and I've never been to Universal Studios. Plus, I need to replace my Disney hat that I lost at King's Dominion.

    Well, I need to get my beauty sleep. No, I mean that. Take care, I'll see you on the other side.

Now Playing: The Scientist - Coldplay

I was just guessing at numbers and figures,

Pulling your puzzles apart.

Questions of science, science and progress,

Do not speak as loud as my heart.

 

The Accidental Tourist

October 14, 2002

 

    I've been on auto-pilot for some time now. Which is better than being in neutral. Auto-pilot isn't a problem if you're actually cruising along at 60. It's not as good when you're going a more pedestrian like 35. I know, you're probably scratching your head and wondering what I'm talking about. Perhaps you'll relate with this one, perhaps you won't. I've been letting the house sort of run itself. I have few visitors so I haven't really done a good cleaning around here in a while. Today, I used the holiday to clean the main floor of my house. I washed the floors, cleaned the guest bathroom, cleaned up the kitchen (mostly), vacuumed the carpet, did my laundry, ironed some shirts (!). Wow! I actually ironed. Normally this would be spring cleaning. Given the season, I'd call it Faul cleaning. *groan*. Over the last several months, I've been letting my home slip in it's priority for me. In general, I've shown a lack of discipline. I haven't ever really been disciplined in my life. Being single affords a flexibility that I've taken advantage of. The reason I'm concerned about it, is that I can foresee that if I don't become more disciplined in all facets of my life, I will be doomed to do things only when I feel like it. Well, as I get older, I may not have the same amount of energy or my health may not be as good, or I may have responsibilities greater than the ones I have today (such as a family) and instead of letting those things dictate my schedule, I ought to have a decent framework for daily functionality. Talk is easy though. We'll see what happens tomorrow. All in all, today has been a good day for home work.

    Hooray! I recorded 2 songs from my record player onto my computer!!! If I remain disciplined, I'll record all of the U2 songs that are only available on vinyl onto CD! Killer mixes, here we come!!! My friend R will appreciate that. He's a huge U2 fan too, but he doesn't own a record player, so in the next month or so, I ought to be able to send him some remixes, B-Sides and live tracks that he hasn't heard before.

    Hey Hey! The Giants have just beaten the Cardinals and will be headed to the World Series to face off against the Angels. I was rooting for the Giants to make it. I'd like to see Barry Bonds get a World Series ring. Speaking of baseball and the playoffs. I was in St. Louis last week for the HP Enterprise Technical Symposium. This was a business trip and it was a pretty good Symposium. While I was there, one of my co-workers and I bought a scalped ticket to the first game of the NLCS. It was cool to see a playoff game. The Cardinals fans were truly amazing. The Giants won that game, and I secretly cheered. There was so much red in that stadium that I didn't dare to cheer for the Giants openly. The game was good, complete with a bench clearing brawl and we even got to sing the National Anthem. Instead of having someone sing the Anthem, they put the words on the screen and asked us to sing it, accompanied by a color guard and music. Imagine 60,000 people singing the National Anthem. I'm glad that I was able to be a part of that.

    Prior to my trip to St. Louis, I took a mini-vacation to Florida. I left the day after my birthday. I spent 3 days in a house built by my grandmother (designed and financed by her). She built the house for the family. I like it a lot. I'm looking forward to having a romantic, or family get away there. The house has 3 bedrooms, a garage and a small pool. I would have much preferred to have had company while I was there, but that didn't diminish how much I enjoyed my short stay while I was there. Several times while I was there, I had the distinct pleasure of floating on a raft in the pool, reading a book, and drinking a beer. It doesn't get much better than that, except if I were able to drink a Sam Adams instead of a Heineken. But, I'm not complaining, it was pretty cool. The water was between 82 - 84, and the weather wasn't blistering. It was a good time to visit Florida. While I was there, my grandmother put me to work for a few hours, which was good. I did some landscaping for her, and also assisted her on her computer. This woman was on the internet before most of the rest of us. She doesn't everything, but she doesn't have any fear about computers either. I enjoyed hanging out with her for a few days and was even able to get her normally wary Chihuahua to like me. Pixie, usually doesn't like males, but after a few days, she allowed me to pet her. She even licked my hand a few times.

    On Saturday I had the distinct privilege of seeing my friend V in Orlando. We met at a mall, and then tore through it in record time, as I procured a new wardrobe. I think I bought 2 shirts, 6 t-shirts, 1 sweater, 2 pair of kakis, a wallet and cologne. Needless to say, several hundred dollars were spent on my behalf. I had a good time, and I really appreciate a woman's opinion when I'm out clothes shopping. I even received a few compliments when I returned from my trip. I wore one of the new outfits on Sunday, and my niece told me that she'd never seen me in kaki's before. I didn't realize how dressed down I am on Sundays.

    After V and I went shopping, we went to see Red Dragon, which was the first book that Thomas Harris wrote which included Hannibal Lecter. Hannibal was only mentioned briefly in this book, but his role was expanded for the film. I think that they did a really good job with the movie. Even though Ralph Fiennes does not have the build that the book described, he made up for it, with his acting. The cast was really strong and the movie kept me guessing, even though I had read the book. I read it so long ago, I couldn't remember all the twists and turns in it. In many ways, it's superior to The Silence of the Lambs. All in all, I give it a thumbs up. After the film we went to the Olive Garden and made fun of the Homecoming princes and princesses who were dressed to the nines. They were dressed like it was Prom, and for a moment, we had to check the date to make sure it wasn't May.

    The next day, we met up at Disney's MGM studios and spent the day enjoying Star Wars, The Muppets and Indiana Jones. We rode the best ride in the park, several times. It was the Aerosmith ride which was very very cool. I even convinced her to ride the Hollywood Tower of Terror. I was only able to get her to ride that one once. I'm smiling now, as I think about it, because she held onto me very tightly and even ducked her head, as we plunged 13 stories. It was cute, and it was funny. We also dined at two of my favorite restaurants there. We ate at the Sci-fi Diner and the 50's TV diner, which wasn't as fun as the last time I was there, but it was still cool. The burger at the Sci-fi Diner was great! and we were able to get a car in no time. The Sci-fi diner is a little like an indoor drive in movie. The tables are all cars with multiple booths and you watch different movie shorts from the 50's and 60's. They even had a trailer for Plan-9 from Outer Space. Which is one of the worst movies of all time. Watch the movie "Ed Wood" for more background information on that one.

    I really enjoyed myself down in Florida and I helped myself make new memories of MGM. I last went to MGM in 98 with an ex and although I did enjoy myself back then, it was despite the company I kept. 'Nuff said.

    Woo, it's getting late and I have to go to work in the morning. I wanted to close with local news, which has become national. The sniper attacks. I just received an e-mail from V, who had read today's latest shooting and was sending her prayers to those she knows in the area. I actually haven't thought about the attacks much, except when I'm standing in front of the TV. I don't really have too much to say about this, but I do hope that they catch this guy soon. My sister lives near one of the crime scenes and is worried about her husband being out on the road. He drives for UPS and would be out and about all day. Since I've moved back to the Washington Area, I have seen a plane fly into the Pentagon, anthrax attacks and now a rogue sniper. It's good to be home.

 

Now Playing: One Tree Hill (Live) - U2

I don't believe in painted roses or bleeding hearts.

While bullets rape the night of the merciful.

I'll see you again when the stars fall from the sky

and the moon has turned red over One Tree Hill.